Shocking

I was feeling more chilled yesterday, Cornflake and I almost polished off a litre bottle of cheap sherry by 4pm, it helps.

However that’s not the most shocking news from yesterday.

On our walk we ended up wandering along the canal on the north side of the zoo. I rarely use the tow paths for any lengthly walks since I was mugged on one of them by three youths. I did give chase, much to their horror, but the little bastards had another gear and I did not. I was reduced to screaming at them, promising to poke out their eyes and rip off their genitals should I ever get my hands on them. Friday afternoon, barge driving day trippers watched the scene unfold open mouthed, apparently more horrified at my foul mouthed response than by the mugging itself. The police were very helpful and worried about my well being. I felt I had to explain that at that moment I didn’t need sympathy, that I was probably the dangerous one and not to worry about giving me a lift home. I walked the several miles home along the canal in a furious, defiant mood. I’m not such an idiot that I walked the canal with cash or precious goods. My robbers got away with £2 in a plastic purse used solely for such trips. They ripped it from my wrist from behind. They were very quick and it took a few seconds to sink in that they had taken my purse, leaving a confusing strap still attached to my arm that I stared at gormlessly. No physical harm and just £2 down. However, they stole my joy of walking the canal to and from work and for that I cannot forgive them. The promise to blind them and rip off their wedding tackle still stands. They’re probably safe. I couldn’t pick them out of a photo lineup back then and now they’ll be in the early stages of middle age. I imagine them having spent some time residing at one her majesty’s prisons but perhaps at least one of them reformed while banged up and is now a religious leader in some war torn, far eastern state.

That episode is not the shocking thing to which I refer either

Along the zoo perimeter that borders the canal you can see the warthogs. Fabulous, proof that looks aren’t everything. It’s also where the African hunting dogs prowl, attack ready. I’m glad the fence is high and there is a waterway between us and them. We wouldn’t stand a chance of surviving a scrap with that pack. They look at us with bad intent, we’re dinner. Really they do, they really think we are.

Cornflake was attracting their attention, (WTF?) standing scarily close to the edge of the canal when he noticed that the canal water has become clear. You can see the bottom, you can read the names on the discarded carrier bags. I don’t know if you can appreciate how shocking this is. Super shocking, OMG look at that! shocking. I have never, ever, ever witnessed a clear water canal in Camden before.

No canal boats for hire, no canal traffic at all in fact. Frenchie suggested that less air pollution to dissolve into it might also be a contributing factor.

It goes to show what grossly messy tarts we humans are.

The canal at Camden lock, I love a weeping willow.