The good lie

The good lie.

Is there such a thing?

Asking for a friend.

No not really.

My journey to the studio takes me past a nail bar that has a neon sign that should say, The Good Life, in twiddly script. Sadly the f isn’t working at the moment. Without the f this cursive sign says, The Good Lie.

It reminds me of one of my favourite movie moments, the moment after Selina Kyle turns into Cat Woman. She smashes the o and t on her, Hello There, sign. Hell here.

Anyhow, the good lie sign, got me thinking about lies, not the whopper political, misinformation type, the daily type.

Mostly I would say that I speak the truth, as I see it. I really like a truth that is not opinion, one that is undeniable but these are relatively rare.

A lie never reflects well on the liar, I therefore try to avoid them, however, sometimes the truth might also reflect badly on someone. Obviously that’s ok for other people but I don’t really want to tell a truth that puts me in a bad light if I can help it. This is when the truth thing gets complicated. How much information can you leave out before a truth becomes a lie? Some things that reflect badly on me I want to get out in the open ASAP. I have a guaranteed way to avoid future embarrassment, just tell everyone right away. For instance, a friends boyfriend gave me a professional massage, I passed out and peed myself. Mortifying, but to avoid the possibility of future public disclosure or blackmail, I told everyone before the day was out.

However, on smaller, less horrifying issues I may be guilty of lying by omission.

My most recent lies by omission are mostly about food consumption.

I’m losing the first lockdown weight gain, slowly. Cornflake on the other hand has lost all of his and some extra. He tells me what he’s eaten everyday. Sometimes I tell, some days I change the subject.

Does he really need to know about that pigs in blankets roll from Greggs that I had for a lunch last week? No. The pigs in blankets roll is essentially Xmas dinner minus the turkey and veg, in a roll, stuffing and cranberry sauce included. Cornflake’s diet scheme includes an embargo on bread at home. This has proven a very successful diet hack for us both. No bread equals no butter, it takes the chance of a quick sandwich off the table and that’s diet gold.

I wouldn’t have said that bread was a favourite food of mine, but now that I rarely get any, I really relish it. It’s become a guilty pleasure. What other meals could you slap between two slices of bread I wonder? I think the Earl of Sandwhich lacked the imagination that Greggs has, or perhaps he was too busy at the card table to fully explore his snack concept.

I love Greggs, and that dear reader, is an undeniable truth.