The ballad of Goodly’s passport

I need to renew my passport soon, well, within the next 20 months. It’s time to start thinking about the photo that will officially announce me and my intention to travel. In my experience this task should not be left to the last minute. There are of course arguments for and against a flattering photo. Is it better that the passport control officer thinks; ‘blimey she’s let herself go/ had a hard night/ has lived a life since that photo’ or ‘I’m amazed that this gorgeous creature used that hideous photo in her passport….beautiful and completely lacking vanity’ ? Or thoughts to that effect.

Getting my last passport photo took an entire morning and cost me a fortune. I tried three booths and 2 photographers. All hideous, at best my auntie with a hangover, at worst my Dad in drag. I came home, washed and blow dried my hair, applied makeup and returned to the most flatteringly lit booth. The resulting photo is of an over-made up, middle aged woman just as her Valium kicks in. On the bright side I get to replace it soon, still I’m not looking forward to it.

Goodly has just renewed her passport and this is what she had to say about the experience:

“Apparently when renewing a passport in this modern digital age you can take your own photo and upload it.

So:

1. Had to plead with a daughter to give up her precious time to take photos.

2. Had to find a neutral wall with good natural light.

3. Had to shift a chair, a bed, a bedside table to use said bit of wall.

4. Had to not under any circumstance show any emotion in photos.

5. Made sure I was windswept with minimal makeup and gardening clothes on.

6. Made daughter take eleventy million fecking fugly shadowy photos.

7. Rearrange life for tomorrow to go to a fecking photographer to have it fecking taken properly.”

(See above image for results)

Bon Boyage!